How challenging myself to say yes to everything changed my life

Awkward beginnings

This is a real story I love telling. I hope it inspires at least one other person out there to take action when facing a social rut.

Throughout high school, I was an awkward and introverted person. I had a small group of friends but I didn't put in much effort (or know how) to have genuine conversations with new people.

This pattern persisted in my first year of university. I continued to mingle with the people I already knew.

When I wasn't studying, I was probably playing my thousandth hour of Counter Strike, watching anime or going to the gym.

I did go to a handful of social university events or workshops and chatted to some people in my classes but that didn't result in any lasting friendships.

I didn't feel particularly unhappy at the time either. In fact, it wasn't uncommon for the people I knew to mainly stick with the friends they'd made throughout their school years into adulthood.

But I did feel like something was missing.

The catalyst

I had a radical idea when I started my second year of university.

What if I put my shame aside, and said yes to every social invitation at O-Week (Orientation Week)?

O-Week is a week-long event right before the semester begins where students running clubs (e.g. faculty clubs, sports clubs, social clubs) set up stalls, and other students can sign up to these clubs or the events they're promoting.

I gave myself a pep talk, went to the festival by myself and walked up to every stall I was vaguely interested in.

I signed up to lots of clubs. I even ended up doing things way out of my comfort zone like signing up to go to free dance classes and sporting events by myself.

One of the clubs I signed up to was the Vietnamese student club.

I'm not Vietnamese.

To be honest, I only walked up to the stall because I'd heard someone in a class I had mention that they held amazing events.

A person at the stall explained to me that they were holding a multi-day long camp in a few weeks.

Staying true to my challenge, I went 'f*ck it' and said 'yes' even though I knew absolutely no one at this club or anyone else going to this camp.

The inflection point

I continued to ride this high of putting myself out there, and met a bunch of great people at the camp who I'm still friends with today.

I had such an amazing time that I signed up to be a committee member for the club to help them with graphic design and event planning.

A year later, I ended up being elected into the club's executive team.

I was lucky to meet these people. Even though I went to all the other events and tried joining the committee of another club, I didn't find that same level of connection or enjoyment.

But that's the reality. You won't click perfectly with everyone, people won't always be open to new connections, and you might not be in a situation conducive for a friendship to form.

The difference was that I put myself through the discomfort of meeting x new people and eventually hit the jackpot.

Into adulthood

This experience changed the trajectory of my life.

I still remind myself about it when I'm taking the risk of saying yes to new opportunities or social invitations.

It transformed my social confidence, brought in new opportunities and created new life experiences.

If you're facing a social rut, have a go at this. Even if you don't succeed, keep trying.

Good luck, I'm rooting for you!